For my recent television viewing pleasure (which happens to be the Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson), I received a deluge of commercial advertising between monologue and guests. Since one particular night, a couple of advertisements have been playing over and over in my mind, kind of like a Fergie song (which happens to be Clumsy).
One of the advertisements was from a local home builder, whose name we shall reveal here to protect the innocent: Ivory Homes. The commercial begins showing a married couple in bed together (we shall assume married couple, because in today's world, only married couples would ever be found sharing a bed together). Now, before you get the wrong idea and think I am traveling down a wanton path, I will steer this in a completely different direction.
As the camera moves in closer (did I mention this is a sleeping couple?), the man awakens and springs out of bed and walks over to the window that is shielded by shutters/blinds. While his beautiful wife continues to sleep, he pulls back the blinds to reveal the activity of the world outside their bedroom. The sun is shining brightly!
Do you see where I am going here? The sun shines brightly.....into the room where the alleged spouse, to our idiot man, is sleeping soundly. Now tell me, what man who has ever been married more than a week, would spring out of bed and allow the sun to shine in, only to find that his wife would not face it with a grin? An action like this could most certainly bring on his demise.
Shortly following that commercial was a prescription drug advertisement for Celebrex. (Once again the name revealed to protect the innocent.)
Although the drug company tried to encourage the benefits of their product, the statements that stuck out like a sore thumb to me were: may increase the chance of heart attack or stroke that can lead to death, or serious skin reactions or stomach and intestine problems, such as bleeding and ulcers, can occur without warning and may cause death.
I think I may write to the Ivory Homes Marketing Department and encourage them to also carefully outline the risks in living in one of their homes and doing foolish husband-like things. As I read back over Celebrex warnings, I think it all works.
One of the advertisements was from a local home builder, whose name we shall reveal here to protect the innocent: Ivory Homes. The commercial begins showing a married couple in bed together (we shall assume married couple, because in today's world, only married couples would ever be found sharing a bed together). Now, before you get the wrong idea and think I am traveling down a wanton path, I will steer this in a completely different direction.
As the camera moves in closer (did I mention this is a sleeping couple?), the man awakens and springs out of bed and walks over to the window that is shielded by shutters/blinds. While his beautiful wife continues to sleep, he pulls back the blinds to reveal the activity of the world outside their bedroom. The sun is shining brightly!
Do you see where I am going here? The sun shines brightly.....into the room where the alleged spouse, to our idiot man, is sleeping soundly. Now tell me, what man who has ever been married more than a week, would spring out of bed and allow the sun to shine in, only to find that his wife would not face it with a grin? An action like this could most certainly bring on his demise.
Shortly following that commercial was a prescription drug advertisement for Celebrex. (Once again the name revealed to protect the innocent.)
Although the drug company tried to encourage the benefits of their product, the statements that stuck out like a sore thumb to me were: may increase the chance of heart attack or stroke that can lead to death, or serious skin reactions or stomach and intestine problems, such as bleeding and ulcers, can occur without warning and may cause death.
I think I may write to the Ivory Homes Marketing Department and encourage them to also carefully outline the risks in living in one of their homes and doing foolish husband-like things. As I read back over Celebrex warnings, I think it all works.
It's so true. Both the Ivory Homes thing and the Celebrex thing. I always wonder why drug companies bother to advertise their drugs on television when they have to disclose all of the possible outcomes of using their product. I don't care if I have a heart disease that can only be cured by their drug-- after listening to all the potential side effects, my thoughts are always the same: who in the hell would take that!?
ReplyDeleteHa Ha Ha. That reminds me of a lady at work who was pushing Mary Kay. I told her that Mary Kay dealers are just pot dealers. You can't buy it in the stores, but everyone has a contact.
ReplyDeleteI still can't understand why people think I'm cold and bitter man. Speaking of... Do you know were I can score some of that Celebrex? I've really been Jonesing for a migraine or blood clot. I love your blog.
11:12 PM
Wait....Where are you guys getting your stuff.. I think one of us doesn't belong.. I have no talent what so ever.. You guys are all AWESOME writers, where did the humor come from? Did you guys take all the good stuff on the way down.. Hogs!! Why couldn't you share? Love ya Corey!!
ReplyDelete