We just recently returned from a great trip out to Oregon and we also had the privilege of spending a couple of days on the coast. I love the Oregon Coast. Anytime we make the trip out there, the time near the ocean is always the most cherished.
On this trip, we decided to camp at Beverly Beach for the two days we would be there. The first year Cora and I were married, we camped at the same place. This was going to be an entirely new experience, however, because this time five children came along with us. Albeit the experience was relatively trouble free, tenting with no mattress is not on my list of fun things to do.
After sleeping on the hard ground, even though I wake to the song of birds and the love of my life lying next to me, I got my day started with problems. My back, neck and every limb are screaming at me for not giving them the proper support throughout the night. Not only do I ache, but my bladder is so full, any external pressure would cause the balloon to burst.
I believe if I sleep in an environment with 100% humidity, I am literally drinking the air, therefore, the number of trips to the bathroom increases. I had already made a 3 AM trip to a nearby tree (one of the wonderful benefits of being a man).
Because it is now daytime, and the chances of being seen with my Charlie to the wind have greatly increased, I am now required to make the trek to the actual bathroom. I get my toiletry bag together, a towel and a change of clothes and I head off to the bathroom. This trip will give me an opportunity to also take a shower.
I step over to the urinal and begin my business. A man enters the bathroom, stands at the urinal next to me and begins his business. Bathroom pleasantires are exchanged, "Hi, how are ya!"...then we both continue our business.
The man finishes and walks away....I continue my business.
Another man enters the bathroom, stands at the urinal next to me and begins his business. Bathroom pleasantries are exchanged, "Hi how are ya!"....then we both continue our business.
The man finshes and walks away....I continue my business. Thirty seconds later, I finally finish my business. "Whew! That's gotta be a record!"
I walk over to the sink and look in the mirror, see my reflection and think, "that's not what I was hoping for. I could have sworn I was better looking than that. I must be thinking of someone else."
I walk over to the shower and struggle with the water. It turns out the Cold label is really Hot and the Hot label is really Cold. Now that I have that figured out, I hop in the shower. "Did they make these showers for midgets?" I'm only 5' 5" tall, but I have to bend over to get my head under the shower head. Because these are public showers and it is not really in a closed cubicle, the draft from the 45 degree room is causing me to freeze. It doesn't matter how hot I make the water, I'm still freezing.
My mind reflects back to a similar experience....you see, some couples like to shower together for the sole purpose of water conservation, not really for the purposes of being romantic. The truth is, it is not worth all the hype because only one of you is getting water. One of you, therefore, is not taking a shower.
Let's be honest; one of you is having a great time, the other one is in the back going, "you got a sweater up there? Maybe a windbreaker? Something with a hood would be nice. I would get it, but my butt is frozen to the wall here."
When I snap back from personal reflection, I finish the shower then get dressed. I walk over to the mirror and look at my reflection again. Something is still not right. It is the face! Something scientific happened to my face while I slept. I went to bed normal, I woke up and had no face. The features had gone away while I slept. I think it has something to do with the earth's rotation. As the earth revolves, facial features move with it.
Apparently, while I slept, my face went to Europe. Because there are a finite number of faces, and if the Europeans go to work with no face, it looks bad for them, so this is why everybody gets a shot.
I think this is all nature's way of keeping us humble. At night, you're thinking of your problems....you're thinking of yourself, "why am I going bald? Why did I eat those nuts."
You wake up, you look in the mirror and you go, "that's why! I have no facial features and a t-shirt with baby spit-up on it." It gives you perspective.
On this trip, we decided to camp at Beverly Beach for the two days we would be there. The first year Cora and I were married, we camped at the same place. This was going to be an entirely new experience, however, because this time five children came along with us. Albeit the experience was relatively trouble free, tenting with no mattress is not on my list of fun things to do.
After sleeping on the hard ground, even though I wake to the song of birds and the love of my life lying next to me, I got my day started with problems. My back, neck and every limb are screaming at me for not giving them the proper support throughout the night. Not only do I ache, but my bladder is so full, any external pressure would cause the balloon to burst.
I believe if I sleep in an environment with 100% humidity, I am literally drinking the air, therefore, the number of trips to the bathroom increases. I had already made a 3 AM trip to a nearby tree (one of the wonderful benefits of being a man).
Because it is now daytime, and the chances of being seen with my Charlie to the wind have greatly increased, I am now required to make the trek to the actual bathroom. I get my toiletry bag together, a towel and a change of clothes and I head off to the bathroom. This trip will give me an opportunity to also take a shower.
I step over to the urinal and begin my business. A man enters the bathroom, stands at the urinal next to me and begins his business. Bathroom pleasantires are exchanged, "Hi, how are ya!"...then we both continue our business.
The man finishes and walks away....I continue my business.
Another man enters the bathroom, stands at the urinal next to me and begins his business. Bathroom pleasantries are exchanged, "Hi how are ya!"....then we both continue our business.
The man finshes and walks away....I continue my business. Thirty seconds later, I finally finish my business. "Whew! That's gotta be a record!"
I walk over to the sink and look in the mirror, see my reflection and think, "that's not what I was hoping for. I could have sworn I was better looking than that. I must be thinking of someone else."
I walk over to the shower and struggle with the water. It turns out the Cold label is really Hot and the Hot label is really Cold. Now that I have that figured out, I hop in the shower. "Did they make these showers for midgets?" I'm only 5' 5" tall, but I have to bend over to get my head under the shower head. Because these are public showers and it is not really in a closed cubicle, the draft from the 45 degree room is causing me to freeze. It doesn't matter how hot I make the water, I'm still freezing.
My mind reflects back to a similar experience....you see, some couples like to shower together for the sole purpose of water conservation, not really for the purposes of being romantic. The truth is, it is not worth all the hype because only one of you is getting water. One of you, therefore, is not taking a shower.
Let's be honest; one of you is having a great time, the other one is in the back going, "you got a sweater up there? Maybe a windbreaker? Something with a hood would be nice. I would get it, but my butt is frozen to the wall here."
When I snap back from personal reflection, I finish the shower then get dressed. I walk over to the mirror and look at my reflection again. Something is still not right. It is the face! Something scientific happened to my face while I slept. I went to bed normal, I woke up and had no face. The features had gone away while I slept. I think it has something to do with the earth's rotation. As the earth revolves, facial features move with it.
Apparently, while I slept, my face went to Europe. Because there are a finite number of faces, and if the Europeans go to work with no face, it looks bad for them, so this is why everybody gets a shot.
I think this is all nature's way of keeping us humble. At night, you're thinking of your problems....you're thinking of yourself, "why am I going bald? Why did I eat those nuts."
You wake up, you look in the mirror and you go, "that's why! I have no facial features and a t-shirt with baby spit-up on it." It gives you perspective.
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