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Showing posts from 2008

This Grinch Put Christmas Lights On The House

I don't know why I'm telling you this, but if you put me in front of a keyboard and you ask me to type something, my first impulse is to type:   Corey Moser is a cool dude and that is the truth so there. I've often typed out those words while sitting in front of a blank screen.  Back in the old days, I would punch it out on a typewriter.  Some of you may not know what that is.  You may have to visit a museum to find one, but they were once the latest and greatest in our advanced technological world. I don't know why those are the special words that have often found their way to paper.  Perhaps it is my justification in trying to live with myself.  If I continue to tell myself that, perhaps my arrogance will only shine brighter?  You would think I would just stop with Corey Moser is a cool dude...  but no...I have to accentuate it with and that is the truth so there!   Well anyway, you won't believe what I did on Saturday.  Okay, perhaps you have already guessed, bec

Timber Cat

I have a black, furry cat named Timber.  He thinks he is a dog.  If I pull a post-it note from my desk, he snaps to attention and waits anxiously for me to wad it into a ball and throw it across the room. If only for my own amusement, I acknowledge and participate in my cat's request. He bounds (yes I said bounds, because there is nothing graceful about his attack) after the paper and retrieves it with his mouth and then will bring it back and drop it at my feet. I bend over to pick up the paper.  It is slimy and gross, much like the tennis balls my dog, Jack, would chase and then slobber all over.  Is is supposed to be like this? The cat stands at attention and follows every movement of my hand.  If I wait too long, he'll try to take the paper from me.  I think his tail is wagging; not flicking.  Did he just bark? If I forget to put him in the basement and close the door at night, he'll come knock on my bedroom door at 4:30 in the morning and ask me to let him outside. He

Beat Mom! (not what you think)

Anytime we, as a family, get into our Chevy Suburban to head somewhere; my kids will start shouting, "Beat Mom!"  All six of them will shout this.....multiple times.   This chorus will continue at ever increasing decibels. My wife is not a punching bag.  This is the victory chant and the competitive streak in all of my children to get seat belted before "Mom" does.

Turn Around and Look

I must admit, sometimes I am ashamed by how powerful the "turn around and look" instinct is.  I was driving once and saw a woman driving in the opposite direction and I actually turned around to look.  I'm staring at her car.  I was straining to look at the rear end of a Volkswagon, but still, I felt the need to look. I'm not proud of this, you understand.  It is just a confession.

Time to Support Our New President

On Wednesday morning, the day after the country elected Barack Obama as the new President of the United States, the rains and snow fell in Salt Lake City.  Perhaps this was the mood for most of the conservatives who blanket our state. One individual's perspective brought a smile to my face that day.  He said, "Wow!  We elected Obama the President yesterday and today it snows.  Global Warming has already backed off. This guy is amazing!" Yet, a friend who was not so pleased with the results said, "All my life I have been told that the Lord's Second Coming will be in my lifetime.  I think November 4th was as close to that day as could be possible.  I was surprised the sun even came up on Wednesday."  Obviously, her man, and mine, didn't win. Prior to November 4th, much of the country was divided.  More than 63 million votes went to Barack Obama; nearly 56 million votes went to John McCain.  A record number of people cast their ballots as mud was being flun

I'm home

For those of you who don't know, for the last couple of months I have been working from my home.  Earlier this year, I was able to see the end of a long-term lease and given the current state of the economy; including the mortgage industry, it just made sense to close the office and save myself a lot of money by working from home.  For the most part, this has worked really well.   I have lost a few employees in transition, but those who have chosen to remain with me seem pleased with the opportunity to also work from home.  The great thing about current technology is that there is really no decrease in the quality of the service we can provide for our customers.  The direction we have been going over the last several years is to be internet specific and to provide services for people that did not require a face-to-face interaction. Admittedly, there are some things I do miss about working in an office.  The best part was having good people around me and being able to associate with

T Shirt

Inspired by the song, T Shirt,  by Shontelle; I thought of wearing nothing but my wife's T-shirt, but I have a feeling it will just leave me feeling uncomfortable and confused. Lyrics

My Conversation with Nathan

"Hey Dad, did you give the cat some catnip either today or yesterday?" "Nope" "Have you ever given our cat some catnip?" "Yep" "Hmmm, well, does catnip makes cats go crazy?" "Yep" "Is catnip a drug?" "Yep" "Well, I guess that means our cat isn't a mormon"

Look....a bird!

On Friday morning, my neighbor and friend, Todd asked me to go horseback riding with him up Yellow Fork.  On our way up the canyon, I spotted some large birds in somebody's driveway. "Oh wow," I exclaimed, "look at that!  They have peacocks." As we got closer, I realized they weren't peacocks.  Rather than look stupid, I corrected myself. "Oh, no!  They're pheasants." Todd looked over, then looked at me and said, "they're turkeys."

You look like a monkey and you act like one too!

Per Matthew's request, I took him to the bathroom at some point during Sacrament Meeting today.   While he was taking care of business, I looked at the person staring back at me in the mirror.  I wasn't content at just looking at the handsome devil staring back.  I winked at him and grinned. The person staring back did the same.   I then flexed my muscles and the person staring back at me did the same. I then raised both hands above my head and moved them in 4/4 time, as if directing the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.  The person staring back at me did the same. I then did some Karate moves and chopped at imaginary blocks in front of me; the person in the mirror did the same. Content that the person in the mirror, was in fact, me.  I looked at Matthew to see if he was finished with his business.  He stared at me 'wide-eyed' and said, "dad, why are you acting like a monkey?" I guess I need to work a bit on my form.

"I think somebody stole our car!"

"Hello lover." I had just pulled into the garage and walked into the house to say hi to my wife before I was about to head out the door again for work. This had become a rare opportunity with our hectic schedules; both of us trying to juggle school and full-time jobs. I crossed the kitchen and embraced Coralee and kissed her gently. "I guess I'll see you late tonight?" It was stated more as a question because of the uncertainty I'd be awake when she got home from work. The question was more for myself than for her. "I hope so," she answered with a smile. I walked to our bedroom and retrieved a backpack filled with things I used at work. I said my goodbyes and then walked into the garage. To my horror, the car, which I had just parked, was missing. The garage door was open, which wasn't much of a surprise to me because I had left it open knowing I was only going to be home for a few minutes. I immediately broke into a sweat. My heart was r

The phone is for you

Shortly before I served an LDS Mission in Recife, Brazil, I was lazily enjoying an afternoon at home; listening to music. The phone rang, and my brother answered. "Corey, the phone is for you!" "Who is it?" "It's Todd." Todd was a friend from High School and he probably wanted to hang out. I casually made my way to the phone, winked at my siblings and said, "watch this." I picked up the phone, lifted the receiver to my ear and began making a series of sounds. I started with the clearing of my throat, "Hmmmm..aaaaa....*cough, cough* hmmm, hmmm, ack, ack" After going on with the throat clearing noises for about 30 seconds, I began belching the alphabet, "A, B, C, D......." My brothers and sister were laughing. After the alphabet, I started hopping up and down with my arms rounded in a downward hang; fingers dangling. I made the sounds of a gorilla, "heeeee heeee haaaa haaaa oooooohhhh oooohhhh" Every once in

God Be With You Til We Meet Again....

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, we are taught that when we pray, we address our Father in Heaven. We then thank Him for ... (fill in the blanks here) and then we ask Him for ... (fill in the blanks here). We then close in the name of Jesus Christ. I have understood this order of prayer since I was a child......keep that in mind as you read this post. I graduated High School in 1989. In my small town, and a graduating class of 63 students, the High School graduation ceremony is a big event. People from the entire community come out to celebrate their kin's accomplishment of being able to read, write and do some math. In the year, 1989, it was still okay to open and close a secular graduation ceremony with a prayer. A few days before the big event, I was asked to be prepared to give the opening prayer. I was filled with so much anxiety and nervousness about this task; I petitioned my dad for some help in what to say in this prayer. Being the won

My first kiss....a flatulent experience

My family had just moved to Kamas, Utah, and I was the new kid on the block. The new blood in a small town made me a fascinating prospect for the ladies. I had never had so much attention and I was loving it. Shelley Smith lived only a few houses from mine; just around the block. She started coming over to the house and we spent a lot of time together: riding our bikes, slurping cherry sno-cones from Dick's Drive-Inn, and fishing in the stream that parted our houses. She was the only person I really knew that summer, and she became my best friend. One night, we were bouncing on her trampoline and she asked me if I "would go with her." "Where?" "No, I mean, will you go with me? You know, we are boyfriend and girlfriend." "Oh, yeah....sure. Can we still go fishing?" "Yeah. I think so. I think the only thing different is that we get to hold hands and kiss." With those words, my heart raced and my palms started sweating. I lik

Air Conditioning

Some of us here at the office were reflecting back on some of our more embarrassing moments. After a few laughs, I thought to myself, "why not blog about some of my more embarrassing moments?" I can't think of anyone better to share this with than you..... So, over the next few days, I'll share some of my experiences with you. I'll start this off by publishing a photo after shoveling the driveway last winter. I was so proud of the accomplishment that I forgot to close the hatch after coloring the snow.

Ants playing football

As I sometimes do while I'm waiting for my carpool buddies to show up, I'll go outside and walk around my yard. I usually check to see if the sprinklers are providing adequate coverage to all parts of my lawn. Sometimes I just sit on the porch and prepare myself for the new day. It is always peaceful and quiet in the morning.....I love this time of day. This morning, as I walked across the driveway, I noticed several ants in small huddles; like in football. It was fascinating. They were scattered all over the driveway, but always in these small bunches of 7 or 8, all their heads together. They looked like little ink-spot flowers. Perhaps these small clusters of ants were enjoying a friendly game of football. I wanted to play, so I grabbed the football the kids had left outside. I tossed it across the yard and waited for the ants to bring it back. I didn't have time to find out if they would, so I decided to walk up to Chris' house, rather than wait for him to c

Nothing

I haven't blogged since May. Are you kidding me? Randall suggested I blog about "nothing." So, I will blog....nothing.

Slept in

"Can you give me a few extra minutes this morning? I'm running behind." Those were the first words I remember hearing this morning when I answered my cell phone at 6:52. I rubbed my eyes and tried to process the words. "Yeah, that would be just fine with me if you guys are running a little behind. I'll be there in a few minutes." My alarm had gone off at 6:00. I remember being conscious then and thinking, wow, I'm surprisingly more awake than I thought I'd be. I do have some time to kill. I'm just going to stay here for a few more minutes, and then I'll get up and shower. I was scheduled to drive for our carpool, and Brian sarcastically, but graciously, gave me a few extra minutes to get ready. "We're at your back door." He and Chris both walked down to my house when I didn't pick them up at 6:45. The realization that I had slept in just slapped me in the face. "Did your alarm go off this morning," Coralee ask

Stalked by a Banshee

I think there is a ghost following me around. I think it is a Banshee that has a crush on me. Bald is beautiful to the undead. A couple of times, over the last few weeks, I have walked into our kitchen and the radio across the room will turn on. It is always a love song. I think the lyrics go something like, "La la la la la..... La la la la la..... La la la la la... La La La La La La." (Insert favorite love song there.) One night, I was working late. I heard footsteps in the office building above me, and then I heard a door close. I left my office shortly thereafter. When I got into my truck to drive away, I looked around the parking lot for another vehicle........there was nothing there. All of the lights were off in the office building above mine. I then turned the radio on in my truck and I heard...... "La la la la la..... La la la la la..... La la la la la... La La La La La La."

My hair has a passport

I figured out where my hair, that should be growing on top of my head, has gone. It is now growing inside my ears. That changes the romantic allure of having Coralee run her fingers through my hair. Have you ever watched bowling? You've seen bowlers shine their bowling balls with spit and polish them off with a towel? For this bald man.....that seems curiously exciting.

4 Dudes in a Truck

Every once in awhile, a few of us at the office get the urge to walk the 300 yards from our office to a local Chevron station to get a drink. Today's journey would include Chris, Jeff and Randall. The rain was an early deterrent. "Not for me, my friends. I'm going back inside." "Ah, come on! It's not that bad." "Um, yeah, it really is. Enjoy! I'll see ya when you get back." I walked back into the office only to be followed by the other three. They were dragging their feet and their heads were down. I think Chris may have been crying. As I looked them over, I realized they were all crying, or maybe it was the rain on their faces.....I'm not sure. "Alright, alright! I'll drive," I said, "let's go!" I think Randall may have pumped his fist and jumped into the air. Jeff broke into song and Chris immediately dropped to the ground and began kissing my feet. After I felt the worship was sufficient, we hopp

Rain will make the flowers grow....

I was in the mood for music from Les Miserables. I cranked up my itunes. I started singing....quietly at first, then I decided it was really time to belt it out. "A little fall of rain, can hardly hurt me now!" I thought I was alone in the office. "You're here, that's all I need to know!" I turned up the music a little louder. I printed out the rate sheets for the day. "And you will keep me safe!" I walked over to the printer, danced a little jig and picked up the rate sheet off of the printer. Wow! I sound good. I drop an octave lower and continue..... "And you will keep me close!" I look to my left, and there is one of my loan officers......meeting with clients. I wink at them, give them a salute, "how ya doin'?" They laugh. I turn the corner and walk away....and I continue.... "And rain will make the flowers grow!"

busy

Yes, it is true. We have purchased milk since my last blog. Perhaps we have purchased it a couple of times. I'm not sure. Things have been a little hectic lately. I guess my idea of finding a strategy that would help me blog more often isn't working. I have been interviewing, hiring and training new people here at work. Mortgage applications have also been coming in more frequently, although the majority of the people who apply for a home loan lately no longer qualify. It really just equates to more work for me, and less compensation for my time. I have also been trying to write a 40 hour course for the Ogden Weber Applied Technology College ( OWATC ) for their mortgage school: A Principal Lending Manager's course. This is a class that licensed mortgage loan officers can take after they have been in the mortgage industry a minimum of three years and have the desire to become a PLM and manage and/or operate a mortgage company. Writing this course is quite challengi

blog musing (blusing)

Maybe I should blog on the days we buy milk. I need something as a reminder that it is time to blog again. If I were to blog on the days I go running, then you would never hear from me again. If I were to blog every time I think about Coralee, then I would be an irritant, because I would blog too often. I'll stick with the milk.

Got Milk?

We were low on milk on Monday, so I volunteered to go to the store. We drink a lot of milk at our house; to the tune of approximately 12 gallons every 7 to 10 days. I love telling people that. Just the look on their faces is worth the statement alone. Most of you reading this are thinking, "I have never had that much milk in my lifetime." We really didn't need much else from the store; just milk. As I was loading the shopping cart, I thought to myself, "people are going to look at me very strangely. Who buys this much of anything with an expiration date, all at one time?" I recognized the awkwardness of this situation, so right then and there I decided I was going to have some fun with this. As I suspected, the clerk checking me out looked at me strangely and said, "that's a lot of milk." "Yes it is." "I guess you're in charge of the milk and donuts at work?" I wasn't buying any donuts, but the suggestion had me won

Dead or Alive

On Sunday afternoon, I found some leftovers in the fridge and piled my plate high with all varieties of meat: pork roast, boneless chicken wings and steak and chicken from the previous night's fajitas. Mmmm, good! I didn't put any fruits or vegetables on my plate, just the meat. I sat down at the table with the rest of the family and published tidings of great joy of my excitement of eating this; and later that evening a steak that Coralee had planned for dinner. Everybody looked at me strangely. They all had a a good variety from all the food groups. "Nothing but meat, my friends....nothing but meat," I announced, "I may not survive the day after all of this. You wouldn't miss me much if I kicked the bucket, would you?" Nobody really disagreed with me. "No worries, Honey," I continued, looking fondly at Coralee, "I'm worth more dead than alive!" "The only problem," she said, "is that you're not worth enough

If you die, you will be "severely" punished

Warning: This post is morbid. If the macabre makes you sick, please do not read on. If you can handle it, please keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle at all times until we come to a complete stop. ---------------- Apparently, a mayor in a small town in south west France has banned his township's residents from dying. He has threated "severe" punishment for anyone who disobeys. (article) The mayor was forced to take drastic action when he realized there was no more room in the graveyard. I would be interested to see what the "severe" punishment may be. Perhaps instead of a proper burial, these residents may be turned into Soylent Green . What a classic movie! This is part of my DVD collection, and you're welcome to borrow it if you'd like. (Spoiler alert: Soylent Green IS people). --------------- Speaking of a proper burial, that reminds me of a crazy dream I had the other night. Fortunately, Kevin Bacon did not haunt my dreams this ti

Leadership is Acting by Doing

Okay, are you as confused by the title as I am? There is a television advertisement running several times at night. I don't know if it runs much during the day, because my television viewing experiences take place after 10:00 PM. The company advertising is Tanner Transmissions (yes, once again I am using the actual name to protect the innocent). As much as I am plugging companies and placing their website links to my blog, I think these companies should start paying me commissions. Good or bad publicity is still publicity, eh? I don't think Tanner Transmissions hires actors for their commercials. I don't think they even consider hiring a marketing firm to generate ideas. I imagine a few of the guys in the shop just pull out a Karaoke machine during their lunch breaks, pull the microphone close to their lips and crank out ideas of what would be great in attracting new business to the company. The guy in the corner with a voice like Kevin Eubank (or Mickey Mouse for t

.....may cause death

For my recent television viewing pleasure (which happens to be the Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson ), I received a deluge of commercial advertising between monologue and guests. Since one particular night, a couple of advertisements have been playing over and over in my mind, kind of like a Fergie song (which happens to be Clumsy ). One of the advertisements was from a local home builder, whose name we shall reveal here to protect the innocent: Ivory Homes . The commercial begins showing a married couple in bed together (we shall assume married couple, because in today's world, only married couples would ever be found sharing a bed together). Now, before you get the wrong idea and think I am traveling down a wanton path, I will steer this in a completely different direction. As the camera moves in closer (did I mention this is a sleeping couple?), the man awakens and springs out of bed and walks over to the window that is shielded by shutters/blinds. While his beautiful

"Yeah, Dude, Mr Max!"

Following yesterday's "round table" discussion with Executives from Wachovia, the Western States Regional Vice President approached me and said, "nice boots!" I was wearing my Justin boots, something I wear almost everyday. "Thank you." "Hey, are you Mormon," he asked. I wasn't sure where he was going with this, but I said, "yes." He then broke from his business professional character and said, "oh, sweet, Dude! I've got this funny story to tell you." He continued, "you remember Mr. Max? You know, Dude, Mr. Max. The guy who sells cheap polyester suits?" "Oh, you mean, Mr Mac . Yes. Mr Mac is still around. They're known for their attire for men," I said. "Sweet! Yeah, yeah, yeah....Mr. Max." "Anyway, Dude, when I was a kid, my dad was a Stake President." He laughed and then continued, "We were having a Stake Conference and a General Authority (church leader)

Poop and Wachovia

I've been invited to attend a conference tonight with Executives from Wachovia Mortgage Corporation. They want my feedback on how to improve their processes. I will be treated to dinner and a Jazz vs. Pistons basketball game. I called Coralee to ask her how her day was going and to inquire about our schedule for the evening. She informed me that she was cleaning up children's puke and poopies, but encouraged me to attend this evening's events. I'm feeling extremely guilty about this.

"Leave me alone!"

In following the counsel of our church leaders, Coralee and I decided we will spend Sunday evenings with each of our children, on an individual basis, and have an opportunity to discuss things that are important to them. This time is set aside, ideally, without interruption and it gives the children the individual attention they seek and/or deserve. We began this time with our youngest and moved our way up the ladder. We invited Karissa into the den. She played with some toys and told us all about them, "car.......car.......Thomas.......train......Thomas." She gave each of us a hug and a kiss and when her time with us was over, she happily went to bed. Matthew was very anxious to spend time with us. He told us about his day and the things he played with. He giggled often and told us he knew how to use the potty. We mentioned things that he will get to do next year with preschool. He smiled and said, "yes, cause I'm big!" "Yes you are," we excla

I got it from you Dad

"I was pleased with your report card," I said to Bryson. I was driving with him over to his Cub Scout Pack Meeting last night, and this was a good opportunity to talk with him about the progress report we received that afternoon from his teacher. "You're doing a really good job in school and your mom and I are very happy that you work so hard." "Thanks Dad!" "Is school hard for you," I asked. "No. I've got good brains." "Where did you get these 'good brains'?" "I must have got them from you, Dad," he said. "I wish that were true, but I think you can credit your mom for the brains." "Well, then I guess I got my good looks from you." "Hmmm. I wish that were true, but I think you can credit your mom for the good looks too." "So, what did I get from you," he asked. "Well, about 20 years from now, you'll credit me, but not thank me for your baldness."

Not on the new carpet!

We decided last night was a good night to go out for dinner. We kicked around a few ideas, but most of the places were quite the distance from our home, so we thought we'd settle for Wingers (just a few short blocks from our house). They have been advertising their Fajita Platters for $9.99 and it seems their kids' menu is reasonably priced. As we were pulling into the parking lot, Coralee looked over and noticed another restaurant had recently opened up. We were thrilled to find out that it was a Training Table, one of our favorite places to go. We quickly changed our mind on where we were eating out and pulled into the Training Table's parking lot. The place is so new, the aroma from within was of carpenter's glue, not hamburgers and fries. After speaking with the restaurant's manager, I learned the place only opened up on Friday at 7:00pm. Jeff and Bryse had a Hickory Burger. Coralee had a Chile Verde Burger; I had a Guacamole Bacon Burger and we picked up s

How did they go?

When you hear of someone's passing, are you more concerned with how the survivors are dealing with it or, perhaps, are you most interested in hearing how the recently deceased left this world? As you are pondering this question, here are some Jack Handy quotes to influence you: I remember we were all horrified to see Grandpa up on the roof with his Superman cape on. "Get down!" yelled Uncle Lou. "Don't move!" screamed Grandma. But Grandpa wouldn't listen. He walked to the edge of the roof and stuck out his arms, like he was going to fly. I forget what happened after that. Instead of burning a guy at the stake, what about burning him at the STILTS? It probably lasts longer, plus it moves around. My young son asked me what happens after we die. I told him we get buried under a bunch of dirt and worms eat our bodies. I guess I should have told him the truth - that most of us go to Hell and burn eternally - but I didn't want to upset him. If your friend

35 seconds left

With only 35 seconds left in the SuperBowl, Matthew exclaims, "I have to go potty!" The SuperBowl! Giants were only up by 3 points, and Tom Brady was about to advance his team down field. Tom Brady and the unbeatable Patriots! The SuperBowl! He has to go "potty"!!!! Yes, he has mastered the "potty" thing, but problem was: I had already changed him into a 'one piece' pajama. He is not the escape-from-the-pajama artist his sister Rachel was. His problem required my assistance. I ran with him quickly to the bathroom. I yanked off his pajamas and his pull-up and I say, "you go potty. I'll be right back." Before I could round the corner to return to my much anticipated game, "Dad! I'm done!" Only 1 second left in the game. It appears there are already celebrations, but referees are chasing players and coaches off the field to allow one more play. 'Were the Patriots on fourth down? Do they still have possessio

My Sunday Diary-January 27th

During Sacrament Meeting on Sunday, Karissa decided it would be great fun to pull each of the Hymn Books off of their shelves and hand them to each member in our family. We were only allowed to hold onto them for about four seconds and she would retrieve them and place them back onto their shelves. This process continued for about 20 minutes. The most entertaining part of this show was watching her heave these books with all her might. As she would do so, the momentum would throw her into the bench we were all sitting on. She would hit the bench with enough force, she would immediately bounce back and hit the bench on the opposite side. She'd hit that with enough force that she would fall down. It was like watching a human pinball machine. I looked around for popcorn and a soda, but the best I could come up with was a piece of gum that was tucked inside my suit coat pocket. As I popped a stick of gum into my mouth, Nathan saw me and said, "can I have some?" I looked aroun

My Conversation with Nathan

Last Saturday, I took my boys to see the new National Treasure movie. As we were driving over to the theater, Nathan struck up a conversation: "Are you excited to see this movie," he asked. "I guess so," I replied. "Well, Dad, if you're not that excited about it, you should turn the car around and let's go back home." "Well, I've already purchased the tickets." "I think you should sell them on ebay if you're not that excited to see the movie." "Nate, I am excited to see the movie, but probably not as excited as you are. Besides, I couldn't sell them on ebay. The show starts in about 15 minutes." "They should have an ebay stand at the movie theater so you can sell the tickets you don't want." As we were driving along, he continued, "what would happen if a helicopter flew you to the top of the sharpest mountain, would it hurt to sit on it?" I laughed, "well, Nate, I don't t

Chicken for Dinner

Coralee made a rotisserie style chicken last night for dinner. Mmmmm. It was so tender and cooked to perfection. Thanks Honey! When it came out of the oven, Nathan looked at it and said, "can I have turkey instead?" "No, this is what's for dinner," I said. After the blessing, we dished out various items to each of the children's plates. Coralee began carving the chicken and placing portions on each of the plates. Nathan watched curiously as the bird slowly changed from a plump and scrumptious bird to a skeletal shell. Nathan continued his inquiries, "is that the chicken's heart?" He was pointing to a darkened portion of the meat near the rib cage. Cora replied, "no, the heart was already taken out before I cooked it." She continued, "some people like to eat the heart of a chicken though." Nathan stared in disbelief. His eyes shifted left to right to capture the reaction from his siblings. "What about the chicken

Wake up!!!!

I really should get to bed earlier at night. Now that David Letterman has returned to television, I find myself engrossed in his "late night" rhetoric. Following his monologue and first or second guest, I shut off the television and then find myself sucked into reading; at the present time, a Nicholas Sparks novel. At 5:30 each morning, my alarm clock introduces me to the world of the living with the local news station's morning crew talking about the weather and traffic. This morning, I reached over and turned off the alarm. The alarm had startled my beautiful wife. I know that if I remain in bed too long, she'll shake my arm or rub my back and tell me it is time to get up. I roll over to my stomach and prop myself up, resting on my elbows. This is more an effort to demonstrate to my dear wife that I am awake; not so much to motivate me into getting out of bed. It is so warm and comfortable in my bed. I decide I'll remain for just a few more minutes. Thir